I was abused as a child, and have dealt with the emotional issues very well, up until now. Recently I started to have torturous nightmares of the abuse I used to suffer, and it's affecting my relationships so much.My abuse ended when my mum left my biological dad, I was only little (say a young toddler), and up until now, don't remember much about it, only my biological father decided to contact me on my birthday and has decided to try and build bridges, I didn't reply to his letter, only threw it in a draw incase I changed my mind in the future. Now I have nightmares every night and can't close my eyes without seeing the things happen to me, and feel them as if I'm there, I need help, my relationship is under so much strain, and my family are suffering to, with my mood swings from lack of sleep. Please could anyone shed some light on why it's happening only now, many years after the abuse ended.

Best regards for the holiday season which ever one you celebrate

CRT

hi there,
i'm sorry to hear you are having such a difficult time just now. i think what has happened is that, like so many survivors, you have managed to push the memories and feelings to the back of your mind so as to get on with your life. the recent contact from your father has brought it all to the surface again. this is a common problem for survivors of abuse.

i know it must be very difficult and will affect your family life too but the best way to sort this is to deal with what happened in the past, rather that pushing it all away again. i would suggest that you get some support to get you through this. we can support you through e mail, message board, phone or face to face if you are not too far away from dundee. if you like and prefer, we can find other agencies to support you through this?

your family too can help with this by understanding and being patient.

this is not your fault! you need to know that and so does your family! you can sort this out.

take good care.

Thank you Laurie for your advice, I hope not to offend you though by telling you I got advice from a previous consellor who has been brilliant about the whole thing. My partner knows what's been going on and has been so supportive, my family still aren't aware of all the nightmares I have, but they are aware I'm having issues coping with my fathers recent contact, and have supported me so much, unfortunatly though my father isn't helping himself in building the bridges he claimed he wanted to, as he gave me an ultimatum to contact him soon or get lost, nice of a guy who wants to get to know his daughter after almost 15 years . But I'm moving on and jsut wanted to let you know this.
Thank you so much for your help it's been invaluable.
Hope as many other people can get the help they need to carry on with theyr life from your organisation.